The ring bearer, or page boy, is one of the key wedding attendants in the ceremony. He is typically a child between the ages of 4 and 10 that is either a close relative or friend of the bride and groom. His job is to carry the rings down the aisle to the bride and groom on a pillow while all guests fawn over how cute he looks in his little tuxedo. Having child attendants in your wedding is a great way to get more family members involved, but children can be very unpredictable and on a day as important as your wedding day, the last thing you want is a wild factor. We’ve got some tips to keep your ring bearer calm and in control so your wedding day goes smoothly.

Remind him that he has an important job

Young children love to know that they are performing an important and grown up task. Explain to your ring bearer that his role is extremely significant and that you are trusting him and only him with the job. By telling him that he is the only one you deemed special and trustworthy enough to handle something of this importance he will feel more grown up and responsible. This will make him take the role more seriously and want to do it right.

Practice makes perfect

When you’re going through the wedding rehearsal, have someone walk with him down the aisle and guide him through what is expected, like smiling and walking at a good pace. Have him practice a few times, both with someone and by himself until you both feel comfortable that he is capable of his duties. Although this does not guarantee he’ll be able to perform exactly the same on the day of, you’ll know that he is able to do so at a level you approve of.

Fake it

If you’re unsure that your ring bearer will be able to make it down the aisle without dropping the pillow and potentially losing the rings, you can fake it by attaching symbolic rings to the pillow and having the best man hold the real rings instead. This will alleviate some of the pressure on this young child and lower your wedding day stress level as you watch him come down the aisle. This is becoming a common trend at formal weddings that include ring bearers in the ceremony due to the amount of responsibility that comes with holding the wedding rings.

Bring in an older child

You may have chosen the kid that will look cutest prancing down the aisle with the rings and pillow in hand, but perhaps you don’t fully trust him to not pull any shenanigans on the actual day. If you’re not totally comfortable trusting him with the full responsibility, why not bring in an older child to accompany him down the aisle? This way you’ll still have the effect of the young, cute ring bearer with the added assurance of an older, more responsible child to mediate the situation. If that doesn’t work, have an adult escort the ring bearer down the aisle.